


What We Couldn't Say

by gayrealism



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, M/M, Other, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:40:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23226445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gayrealism/pseuds/gayrealism
Summary: Lance still couldn't believe it. Allura continued talking, but Lance's brain was struggling to process what she'd said."I'm sorry," Hunk said, when the princess paused, "but did you say the Galra have admitted defeat?"Now that their mission has changed, the paladins can relax, not having to worry about the next attack or mission. Except Keith. The red paladin was acting as moody and broody as ever. Specifically towards Lance. What the hell was up with that?
Relationships: Keith & Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Kudos: 18





	1. Olkarion

Lance still couldn't believe it. Allura continued talking, but Lance's brain was struggling to process what she'd said.

"I'm sorry," Hunk said, when the princess paused, "but did you say the Galra have admitted defeat?"

Allura smiled at him. "I received a transmission while you all were sleeping. A Galra leader named Maxis informed me that the remaining Galra troops have come together and surrendered, and that they were locating an uninhabited planet to begin anew."

"What, we're just supposed to believe them?" Keith said, scoffing, flipping his stupidly long hair out of his face. Lance hated it, but he agreed with Keith. It seemed stupid to believe something like that.

Allura's smile couldn't be dampened, though. "I had similar thoughts. But I contacted Kolivan and the Blades have received a similar message, and believe it to be genuine and authentic.”

Lance stared at her, mouth agape. Sure, they’d defeated Zarkon, Lotor, Honerva, and a bunch of other nameless Galra generals that attempted to seize power. Sure, the Galra were scattered and thrown off many of their conquered planets, uprisings and revolutions causing chaos as native peoples took their planets back. And yes, the empire was only a shadow of what it used to be. But after years of fighting, were they really done? Was it really over?

“You mean… we can go home?” Hunk said, voice breaking. Lance sighed harshly, letting out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding.

Allura’s face fell. “I’m sorry, Hunk. Not quite yet. We need to spend some time assembling the planets into a coalition, one that will function as a way for world leaders to connect and communicate with each other, under the goal of peace and prosperity for all.”

“Like the United Nations!” Pidge exclaimed. “Allura, that’s genius!”

The princess flushed a bit under the praise. Lance was struggling to process everything still. “I don’t get it. Why can’t we go home?”

Allura faltered once more, unsure of how to answer. Shiro stepped up, clearing his throat. “Lance,” he said, parental sympathy in his tone. “Voltron was the face of the revolution. It’s our job to bring peace to the universe. That doesn’t mean just fighting evil. It means establishing a system that will ensure that peace for years to come.”

“How long will it take?” Hunk asked. Lance whipped around, looking to Shiro and Allura for answers. There was a pause, as the two shared a look, communicating silently.

Coran popped out of his seat, twirling his mustache. “I’ve been calculating a route through the galaxies and determining which planets we will need to visit, since the princess informed me of her mission. I’ve plotted a course with 103 planets to visit. If we are efficient, it should only take around one of your Earth years to complete the tour.”

“One year? And then we’re done?” Lance said, hope beginning to burn in his chest. One year, and he’ll be able to see his family, his friends. In one year he’ll be able to go home, see his family, go back to the beach and feel the warm sand between his toes, watch the waves roll onto the shore, eat his mama’s _criollo_ or her _maduros,_ sleep in his own bed! He felt tears well up, and he quickly blinked them away. He was not going to cry.

“Should be,” Coran said, chipper as ever. Lance spun over to Hunk and threw his arms around him.

“One year! One more year and we’ll be able to go home!” Hunk said nothing, just squeezed Lance tight and buried his face in Lance’s shoulder. He knew Hunk had it as bad as he did, not being able to see his family or go home at all these past few years. Pidge had found their family, and could communicate with them whenever they wanted. Shiro and Keith were each other’s family, and the same went for Coran and Allura. Only Hunk knew about the burning hole in Lance’s chest, and only Hunk knew what it was like to hold onto that emptiness for so long. This time, Lance couldn’t hold back the tears that came to his eyes.

“We’re gonna go home,” Hunk whispered. “I miss Earth food so much. You know how weird it is to crave a peanut butter and jelly sandwich this long and not be able to fulfill it? Do you know how many times I have tried to replicate peanut butter with food-goo?" Lance felt a hysterical laugh bubble up from his chest, and couldn’t stop himself from throwing his head back, shoulders shaking.

“Oh my god,” Pidge moaned. “I miss ice cream. I miss taco tuesdays. I miss cheeseburgers.”

Shiro chuckled. Keith remained strangely silent. Hunk kept going on about how even though food-goo was incredibly versatile, there was no replacing home-grown favorites. Lance walked back to his chair, and slumped down in it, unable to wipe the grin off his face. His mind was racing a thousand miles an hour.

Coran stood up, interrupting the chatter before the conversation ran too off-course. “We’re headed to our first stop now, we’ll be there in about two quintants. Allura, Shiro, and I must coordinate our first diplomatic meeting. The rest of you, go on and enjoy yourselves until then.”

Lance whooped, pumping a fist in the air. Pidge walked over to Hunk, and Lance did the same. As they headed out, Lance looked back to see Keith looking solemn as he slunk towards the training room. A twinge of something struck Lance’s chest, cold and sharp, before he shook it off and followed his best friends to the kitchen.

* * *

  
  


Coran had called them back to the bridge while Lance had been enjoying a shower. So of course, he was the last to make it. For once, he came in quietly and sat, awaiting for Allura and Shiro to finish whatever they were doing at the controls. After a moment, they turned around, Allura grinning as she tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear. "All right, paladins. We've further developed a plan to fulfill our mission for universal peace. It will be called the United Planets Coalition, or UPC, for short."

Shiro stepped forward. "Our first diplomatic mission will be hosted at a place you all are familiar with. We are visiting Olkarion, and asking the Olkari to be the first planet to join the UPC. After discussions, we will join them in a celebration. Coran will update us on some modern Olkari celebratory practices."

Coran popped up out of seemingly nowhere. _How does he always do that?_ Lance thought, before he made himself refocus as Coran spoke. "All right paladins, the Olkari are quite reserved and modest during the day, but have quite a lively nightlife. When they do celebrate, they partake in mildly poisonous drinks that incur a pleasant sensation while inhibiting the senses-"

Lance felt giddiness in his chest as his brain decoded the science-y words. But Pidge beat him to it, whooping. "I'll finally get drunk!"

Shiro sent Pidge a dirty look. "You just turned nineteen, Pidge, you aren't allowed to drink."

"On Earth," Pidge corrected, smirking. Shiro continued to glare, but Pidge was incredibly stubborn, acting like they didn't notice.

Shiro sighed, and sat back, knowing that even he could not win against Pidge's bridled chaos. "Remember, you are representing Voltron as an ambassador of peace."

"Even ambassadors can let loose sometimes," Allura countered, a playful lilt in her voice. She and Shiro locked eyes for a long moment, before she continued.

Lance thought that was interesting. The relationship between those two, it was interesting.

"Now, you're all adults," Coran continued, "So no giggling at this next bit of information. It's important. The Olkari are a very sexual people, and while they do believe in monogamy, they also believe that sexual freedom is normal and healthy for the youth. So do not be startled when an Olkari tries to court you, or tries to win your attention. Actually, be prepared for it and ready to decline advances. As paladins of Voltron, you're all highly respected and admired for saving the universe."

"Do you think the Olkari can tell the difference between male and female anatomy in humans?" Pidge wondered. "Would they even try to court someone outside of their species?"

Coran smiled, glad no one had made a joke out of his information. "Good question, Pidge! Based upon my research, the Olkari are very explorative as a species, having many reported relations to many other intelligent species. As to whether or not they are knowledgable of human sex characteristics, I am uncertain. I don't think it matters to them, as their species is hermaphroditic."

"Ooh, really?" Lance heard himself mutter. That earned him a glare from Keith. Pidge looked relieved and kind of excited. Gender and sex was always weird for Pidge. They weren't really a girl or a guy, they were Pidge. Lance could see why a people who don't know or care about gender would interest and excite them. Lance was sure Pidge would trap an Olkari in conversation about the whole thing when they visited. Cultural transmission and appreciation was a part of this whole thing, anyway, right?

"Any other questions?" asked Coran, snapping Lance out of his thoughts.

Hunk raised his hand. "Do we have to wear our Paladin suits? They can be uncomfortable to eat in and sometimes I get heartburn from the chestplate."

Lance snorted, but he agreed: the suits were great for battle, but not the most comfortable to live daily life in. Allura stepped forward, and spoke. "I was thinking about that, and I think we should definitely wear the Paladin armor during the signing, but we can wear our own clothing to the celebration."

Lance zoned out as other small, unimportant things were discussed, and eventually, they were sent back to their rooms to equip their armor and bayards, and do whatever business they needed to. Lance was checking his teeth in the mirror when Coran announced on the intercom that they were landing. After shooting himself finger-guns in the mirror, Lance headed toward the palace's foyer. Pidge, Hunk, Allura, Shiro, and Keith were already there. They stood in quiet formation, awaiting Coran to join them. Once he arrived, the palace doors opened, and Lance had to lift a hand to shield his eyes from the blinding light.

Olkarion was beautiful. A golden sky illuminated by the planet's home star, bright and warm. The huge trees and organic technology of the Olkari made the scene in front of Lance seem surreal, dreamlike. The naturalistic buildings melted into the nature that encircled them, the whole city hugged by flora. The fantastical landscape was different than what Lance had last seen on Olkarion, the capital city much different than the small, desolate village they had assisted. Tall glistening buildings scaffolded into trees filled the skyline, the glass of their windows reflecting rays of sunlight. The most beautiful aspects of city and forest collided in the Olkarion lansdcape. Lance was blinded by the beauty, and found his lungs emptied of their breath.

"Welcome," a warm voice called. Lance lowered his eyes from the gorgeous landscape and took in their welcoming committee. An elder Olkarion in fine tunics headed the v-formation. She was flanked by six other Olkari, four appearing to be officials from their similar tunics and the other two seemed to be guards due to their armor and weapons.

"Thanks for having us," Allura said, her smile genuine. "Thank you for agreeing to be the first planet in our alliance."

"Princess, let us conduct business in the offices. For now, let us meet as people. We have met before, of course," The Olkarion smiled, and Lance recalled their first and only other visit to Olkarion, back when they had first formed Voltron.

"I could never forget, Ryner," the Princess said, and Lance suddenly remembered when they had met. Back then, Ryner had simply been a rebel leader, not an Olkarion governmental leader.

It has been a long, long few years.

"This is La Jie," Ryner said, gesturing to the figure on her left. La Jie smiled politely and waved. "Suden is on his left." Suden nodded to us. "On my right is Maxim, and on her right is Lo Kie." The other two Olkari bowed slightly.

"I'm Princess Allura of Altea, and these are the Paladins of Voltron. We are so honored to be here."

"Enough formalities, don't you think, Princess? Let's go to the offices and discuss further."

Lance was starting to get bored and zoned out. He was not made for this diplomatic stuff. The next year, if it was like this, looked to be full of incredibly dull and dim meetings. Instead of focusing on that, Lance took in the beauty of Olkarion as they walked into the city. When they entered one of the clay buildings, he took in the incredible detail in the design of each building. The architecture was incredible, mimicking nature when it could and doing it's best to support nature when it couldn't. Olkari people bustled in the streets, talking and laughing as they strolled. They eventually reached a large building. The doors opened automatically, and shut silently behind them. An ornate mural was on the floor, an intricate symbol Lance was unfamiliar with. Ryner led them down a corridor and into a large conference room. More officials were already there, seated. Ryner gestured to a row of empty seats. Coran handed Allura some papers and a holographic tablet. Lance zoned out and thought of a bunch of random stuff as Allura conducted her spiel and the Olkari discussed. Everyone participated in the discussion except Lance. Well, and Hunk, who was snacking quietly a few seats down from Lance.

The meeting seemed to drag on and on, Lance went from snacking, to picking his fingernails, to tapping his foot, to jiggling his leg, to tapping his fingers on the table, and back again. Lance was not meant to sit still for longer than a few minutes. He was slowly losing his mind, and his butt was numb by the time the meeting concluded and the last Olkari official had signed their documents.

"Now, it is time to rest." Ryner said, calling attention to the stirring people in the room. "Once the sun sets, there will be a festival in the town square. Please join us so we can celebrate our new alliance of peace!"

With that, the Paladins headed back to the Castle and Lance ran to his room, shucked his armor, and primped and prettied himself. This was the first party he had been to since before Voltron. The first party in five years. He was going to enjoy himself.

He peered into his closet. Through his travels, he had thrifted and bartered and acquired in a plethora of ways a variety of clothing, and settled on a slightly holographic pair of slim-fitting black pants and a loose and light sleeveless tunic that appeared similar to the Olkari fashion. Lance decorated his forearms with gold wristlets and styled his slightly curled hair to the best of his ability. He took out his pot of makeshift kohl, grabbed his makeshift spoolie and used it as mascara. He used a small paintbrush to line his eyes with it as well.

He looked like he stepped out of some sci-fi movie as the dark and charismatic side character that is definitely gay and slightly more interesting than the main character. He smirked at his reflection, and went to the kitchen to fill his stomach. Anticipation was making him queasy, and he knew Hunk was probably cooking dinner in there.

Lance actually came across Pidge first, who was typing into their computer. Rover beeped at Lance in hello, and Lance nudged the little robot affectionately. Lance looked over to the countertop, where Hunk was chopping some sort of plant.

"Hunk, it smells amazing as always. What's on the menu?"

"Vegetable stew. It's almost done, I'm just prepping some garnish."

"Your talents are wasted in Voltron," Lance sighed.

"I know," Hunk said, grinning.

They made small talk, and ate, and talked some more until Coran took to the intercom.

"Sunset is in a few minutes. Paladins, go out and join the festivities when you can!"

Eager, Pidge and Lance both hopped up, and hurried to the palace's doors. When they opened, Lance was stopped in his tracks.

If Olkarion was beautiful during the day, it was downright gorgeous at night. Lights danced in the air, bioluminescent plants and fungi had been encouraged to grow all over the city, lighting it in beautiful neon colors. The glass walls and windows of the buildings reflected the glowing plants, and it looked like the city was a galaxy of twinkling stars.

"Woah," Pidge said breathlessly, rooted in their spot, just like Lance. "I wanna go take a closer look."

Lance grinned, excitement vibrating his bones. "Then let's go."

Grabbing Pidge and Hunk, Lance ran towards the city.

* * *

He felt the music before he heard it. A deep vibration in the stone under his feet, pulsing his heart. Lance's smile split his face, and he dragged Pidge and Hunk towards the party. Bass rumbled the stones and echoed off the buildings, and a techno beat filled his ears as Lance neared the city square.

Hundreds of Olkari were dancing in the plaza, and small groups stood on the side next to drink stands. Pidge bolted towards the refreshment table, and Lance wasn't far behind. He grabbed a shot glass and a bottle, pouring himself a shot, and looked to see his friends awaiting him to pour theirs. Lance, of course, obliged.

"Guys, are you ready?" Lance asked, staring into the short and stout glass of purple liquid.

"Hell yeah!" Pidge shouted, raising their glass. Hunk looked a little uneasy, but clanked his glass with Pidge's. Lance followed suit, and poured the liquid down his throat.

He swallowed, then felt the burn and started coughing. "Holy shit," he gasped between coughs. Pidge was fine, and Hunk sipped on his half-full glass with a grimace.

"Why do people like this stuff?" Hunk said, sniffing it with distaste.

"It isn't about the taste," Pidge said, refilling their glass from the bottle. "It's about how it makes you feel."

Lance said nothing, and looked at the other beverages on the table. He spotted an indigo-colored punch, and poured himself a large glass. Taking a sip, and tasting a fruity flavor that masked the burning alcohol, he drank the glass down. That was much more tolerable. Pidge, the little psychopath, took another shot with giddy glee. Hunk looked like a nervous wreck, lecturing Pidge to be careful.

Lance put his glass down on the table. "I'm gonna go dance!" he shouted to his friends. Hunk looked over to him, pleaing, but Lance saluted him before disappearing into the mob of swirling bodies.

Lance was always a dancer. He could always get lost in music. Especially in an environment like this. He was gone in no time, his soul free as his body moved rhythmically and sensually with the others around him. Time passes, but Lance isn't sure how much. He knows he gets thirsty though, and decides to head back to the drink stands and attempt to locate Hunk and Pidge. Lance grabbed another glass of the indigo punch, and looked around him. No Hunk or Pidge in sight. Unsurprising, though, as Lance had been gone a while. He was pondering where to start looking for them when a figure approached.

"Hey, Paladin" a low, sultry voice called.

Lance turned, and saw a slim, brown-skinned Olkari approach him. Her tunic was short, and belted at her waist with a simple but large golden buckle.

"The name's Lance," he said with a playful smile.

"I'm Min Ah," the Olkari responded, extending her hand. Lance shook it. "Where are you friends?" She asked.

"Ah, I'm not sure," Lance responded. "They don't dance, but I do, so I went without them and seem to have lost them."

Min Ah grabbed Lance's wrist, and started pulling him back towards the crowd. "Then shall we dance more?"

Lance smiled, cheeks hot from the drink. He swallowed the rest of his glass and let Min Ah tug him to the dancefloor. She didn't go far from Lance as they were sucked into the mob of bodies. Somehow, right next to the speakers, they ended up pressed together, and Min Ah kept swaying her hips, brushing against Lance's front. Lance tried to create some distance, to respect her, but Min Ah saw and just pulled him closer, placing his hands on her hips. The beat thumping his heart loud in his ears, Lance held onto Min Ah's slim hips and swayed his body in time with hers. Min Ah spun and wrapped her arms around Lance's neck, and they danced closer. Min Ah's breath in his ear, he heard her whisper something, before grabbing Lance's wrist and dragging him out of the crowd.

They grabbed more drinks, and then danced more, and then danced and drank again. Lance felt like he was floating, and couldn't stop giggling as Min Ah lightly ran a finger down his spine.

"Would you like to go rest somewhere a little quieter, Lance?" She asked, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing herself against his chest.

Lance's pulse jumped, and heat rushed through his body. The drink was burning him from the inside out, but his legs were starting to ache from the dancing. "That sounds wonderful."

Min Ah took his wrist and pulled him towards a dark street shooting off from the city square. They turned a corner and went into an alleyway, where Min Ah led Lance to sit on a box that rested against a clay brick wall. Lance leaned back, and was startled when Min Ah swung one leg over his lap and sat on his thighs, chest to chest with Lance.

He sucked in a breath, feeling her skin radiate heat an inch away from his own. She ducked her head down and captured Lance's lips in a kiss. A real kiss, deep and passionate, nothing like the Pecks that Lance had experienced before. His head swam as his arms encircled her body, pulling it closer to his, chasing the good feeling of her tongue running across his lip. Min Ah's fingers twisted in his hair, and he felt an incredible heat flow between his legs, and he sucked in a breath. Lance felt his hands drop down to her hips, and-

"What are you doing?" A deep, masculine voice demanded.

This voice was like a cold bucket of water over the moment, and Lance pulled back immediately. He looked down to the opening of the alleyway to see Keith, who was standing angrily, shoulders hunched and hands in fists.

"What's it look like?" Lance asked, giggling at the absurdity of the question, the absurdity of the situation. They were just makin' out.

Min Ah stood, and patted Lance's cheek. "Maybe another time, we can get to know each other better, Paladin." She flitted out of the alleyway, shooting Lance a knowing look before heading back to the celebration.

"Look what you did," Lance pouted, feeling a bizarre cold, curdled feeling in his gut.

"Your behavior is disgraceful. We are Paladins of Voltron-"

"It was just a bit of fun-" Lance said, running a hand through his hair.

"You can have fun, but that was inappropriate." Keith said, stern.

"Inappropriate? It was kissing! And why can't I?" Lance demanded, anger stirring in his chest.

"Because-" Keith started.

"Because why? What? You mad it wasn't you I was kissing?" Lance sneered, bitterness making him sick to his stomach.

Keith's face flushed red, and his fists were curled so tight his knuckles turned white. Lance laughed, the sourness of the situation wasa too much. Keith was a different level asshole, to be like this. To go out of his way to lecture Lance during a fucking party.

"Whatever. I'm going to find Hunk and Pidge."

With that, Lance pushed past Keith and headed back to the city center.


	2. Domov Ludi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance looked to the ground, overwhelmed by the sadness this realization brought him. He thought over all the memories he had of himself and Keith. Fighting Galra back to back, gaming in Pidge’s room, training together. Lance had always thought they were closer than brothers, having fought and trained and lived and laughed together for so many years.
> 
> Apparently, he was wrong.

The first thing he could feel was the unbelievable pain, he felt like his skull was splitting.

The second was the nausea.

Lance sat up, rolled off his bed, banging his knees on the floor. He scrambled to his feet, hurried to the bathroom adjacent his room, and emptied his stomach contents into the toilet. His throat burned, as it was all stomach acid. He rinsed his mouth, grabbed his toothbrush, squeezing his eyes shut. His recollection of last night was hazy, but he did remember everything.

He still couldn’t figure out why Keith had gotten so mad at him. He had just been messing around, having fun. Shiro never said they couldn’t mess around. It wasn’t the most straight-laced, rule-follower type of behavior. But Pidge and Hunk weren’t yelled at. And while he was leaving, he definitely saw Pidge giggling in the arms of an Olkari woman.

Whatever. It shouldn’t bother him. It was probably just Keith being his asshole self. He always targeted Lance. In practice, in meetings, in damn near every instance they were ever together. This hatred wasn’t one sided, but Lance never went out of his way to instigate shit or piss Keith off. The bastard always did it first.

But it didn’t matter. What mattered was the immense pressure in his head. Lance clothed himself and headed to the healing pods. He wasn’t sure why he didn’t go there last night and avoided a hangover. Probably because he was stupid drunk. Lance cursed his dumbass self and shielded himself from the bright lights in the hallway. He reached the bridge and pulled up a healing pod. Falling into it, he lost consciousness again.

  
  
  


The next time Lance awoke to the hiss of the healing pod sliding open. He opened his eyes to see Hunk peering down at him, concern in his eyes.

“Dude, you okay?”

Lance rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He remembered the kohl that he had put there, and looked down at his hands too see them smudged with black. He sighed. “Yeah, I only went in there to get rid of my hangover.”

“Wait, we could have done that?” Hunk said, eyes widening slightly and Lance smiled as he began cursing himself. He probably suffered through his hangover, the poor guy.

“Why’d you wake me up?” Lance asked, stretching and stepping out of the pod. He assumed Hunk would follow and keep him company as he showered and took care of business.

“Oh, because Coran said we were going to land at our next stop soon, and to make sure you had enough time to get ready.” Hunk said, matching his stride to Lance’s.

Thinking back to the night before, Lance smirked. “How was your evening, young Hunk?”

Hunk sighed, rubbing his head. Lance laughed. “I tried to keep an eye on Pidge but apparently the drink I picked was alcoholic, and I had drunk a lot of it, and I ended up just coming back to the ship and drunk baking.”

“Oh my god, what did you make? Was it good?” Lance giggled, imagining Hunk stumbling around the kitchen making himself cookies or something.

“It was muffins. And they weren’t great. I tried to eat one when I woke up this morning.”

The two continued their small talk as they went back to Lance’s room. Lance hopped in the shower and Hunk busied himself with reading a comic book he found in Lance’s stack of random Earth finds.

After cleansing himself, Lance felt amazing. He hummed to himself as he applied his skincare routine, and went to his closet to dress himself. He picked out a pair of workout joggers and a tight sweat-wicking t-shirt, knowing that he would have to put on his Paladin suit sooner than later.

“Ready to find Pidge?” Lance asked, nudging Hunk. His friend nodded, and gently set his comic back where he’d gotten it from.

“Wonder how Pidge is doing,” Lance muttered. “They drank so much.”

“They weren’t even hung over.” Hunk said, voice lowered.

“Aw, Hunk, you mad?” Lance said, jokingly. “It’s okay, buddy. Pidge isn’t human. We can’t expect them to experience life the same way we normal people do.”

When they burst into Pidge’s room, they were tinkering with Rover. Pidge finished screwing a panel back onto the little robot. “Are you ready to go to the bridge for Coran to brief us?” Lance said, nudging Pidge with his foot.

Pidge swat him away, and stood. Rover chirped, and followed as the group left. They took a detour to the kitchen when Hunk heard Lance’s stomach rumble. Lance tried Hunk’s drunk muffins, and spat them back out. Pidge laughed maniacally. Lance threw the baked creation into the trash chute, apologizing to Hunk. Keith came into the kitchen, and Lance fell quiet. Hunk and Pidge pretended it wasn’t awkward, or didn’t notice the awkward air around them. Keith walked past Lance towards the counter and grabbed a piece of fruit. Lance accidentally made eye contact with him, and Keith immediately looked away, cheeks reddening. Lance looked down to the plate in front of him, appetite gone. Why were they suddenly weird? Why was Keith acting shy and weird all the damn time now? Why did it make Lance feel weird?

“Oh, Lance, what did you do last night?” Pidge asked. Lance stilled, felt icy coldness strike the pit of his stomach. “After you went to dance, Hunk and I tried to find you, but didn’t see you.” Pidge gasped, and narrowed their eyes at him, smirking. “Did you find someone to occupy your time elsewhere?”

Lance felt his face warm and his hands felt sweaty. He forced himself to laugh. “No, I just danced until my legs wouldn’t hold me up, then dragged myself back to the ship.”

Hunk must have picked up on his discomfort, and tried to shift the conversation. “What did you do last night, Keith? You don’t seem like the party kind of guy.”

Lance lifted his head and looked at Keith, glad the attention was off him. Keith’s face was redder than Lance had ever seen it. Was he embarrassed about interrupting Lance? Ashamed? “Yeah, Keith, what did you do last night?” Lance asked, sneering.

Keith looked up to him, but his face wasn’t defiant like usual. He looked a little… sorry? No, it was more like sadness. Lance felt himself shrink back a bit, surprised and a little ashamed he attacked the guy like that.

Keith broke eye contact with Lance and looked at his fruit. “I just hung out by the drink stands for a while with Shiro and Allura, then went back to the castle.” With that, he took a final bite and tossed it to the trash chute. He turned his back to them and walked to the door. “I’m going to the bridge to await instructions.”

The other three agreed that they should do the same, and cleaned up their mess in the kitchen. Lance sat down in his chair, listening to Hunk and Pidge’s banter. Allura and Shiro were at the helm, discussing something. Keith was sitting quietly in his chair, back stiff and posture perfect.

Coran stepped into the room and called the Paladins to attention. “The planet we are going to next is called Domov Ludi. We have worked with them for a while distantly in the rebellion, but never met with any face to face. I’ve found images of them and their society.” With that, he pulled up a hologram of a bipedal race with smooth, dark green skin. “They can actually photosynthesize, so we won’t be feasting or drinking. Instead, we have been invited to participate in a bonding ceremony that will symbolize the union that we are creating with the treaty.”

“Bonding ceremony?” Pidge asked, curious as ever.

“Yes. The Ludia have a unique, spiritual culture. Their biology is interesting too. Some say that through the bonding ceremony, that you can feel the true feelings of the people you participate in it with.”

“Woah,” Hunk said. Lance was a little skeptical, but kept listening.

“We will perform the bonding ceremony first as a sign of trust, then they will sign onto our cause.” Coran twirled his mustache. “I don’t suppose we will be there very long, and will be able to head to our next destination swiftly.”

Allura turned away from the helm to face the group. “We will be landing in four doboshes. Paladins, go suit up and meet in the foyer.”

With that, Lance stood and kept his gaze forward as he went to put his uniform on. He checked his reflection in the mirror and went to the castle’s main entrance. He stood in formation with the others, and steeled himself for landing when Allura warned them they would be touching ground. She soon joined them, standing next to Shiro. They shared a look, and Lance smiled. Something was definitely going on between them, or was going to, soon.

The doors opened and Lance choked on his breath. The unique beauty of each planet would never fail to amaze him. The sky was a lovely shade of lavender, and the city that laid out before him was spacious and sparse, almost more of a village. But it spread out into the horizon, rooftops mingling with trees in the skyline. Gardens full of teal-hued vegetation and a rainbow of flowers surrounded every building. The buildings looked to be made out of sun-dried white clay, and had sloping roofs that reminded Lance of old spanish architecture. Homesickness struck his heart with a bitter knife, but Lance shook it off to take in their welcoming party.

They were barely clothed, was the first thing he noticed. Their bodies reminded him of bamboo leaves with slim limbs and bulky joints, but their skin was an olive green. Surprisingly humanoid, they looked like someone dipped a bunch of skinny people in paint. The only difference Lance could see was that instead of noses, they had slits in the middle of their faces. Their eyes were bigger than humans, and various shades of brown. The loincloths they wore that covered their chests and waists looked to be light and airy, like cotton, and dyed a deep blue. Their hair was long and raven black, and braided down their backs. They looked like what Lance thought elves or fairies would look like.

“ _Privitat_ ,” One of the Ludia said, stepping forward. “And hello. I am Bozena, leader of the Ludia. Welcome to Domov Ludi. Come, let us go somewhere more comfortable to acquaint ourselves and talk.”

Lance and the other Paladins followed Bozena and her two friends into the city, and entered a large courtyard. Pillows and cushions were arranged in a large circle around what looked to be a rock garden, and a hundred or so Ludia sat cross legged. A space remained empty for the Paladins and Bozena and the other two. Bozena sat, and the others followed suit. Allura sat directly next to Bozena, and then Coran, Shiro, Pidge, and Hunk. Lance looked to his right to see Keith sit on the cushion next to his. Lance, still aware of whatever it was that was going on between them, sat down awkwardly. Why did he have to sit next to Keith?

“Family,” Bozena began, voice commanding the courtyard. A chill went down Lance’s spine. “Today we celebrate the end of the Galra’s reign of our universe. The Paladins of Voltron join us, offering a hand to guide us into an era of peace. Thus, we invite them here to participate in our bonding, so we can feel their genuine hearts, and walk towards an era of prosperity together.”

Bozena paused for a breath, and ushered for them to stand. Lance hopped up, and dusted off his hands on his pants. “I will allow our admirals of peace to introduce themselves before we get started.”

Allura smiled, and looked out to the crowd. “I am Princess Allura of Altea. I am honored to be here and look forward to working towards peace with you all.”

Shiro began introducing himself, and Lance panicked about what he was going to say. He may act confident, but he was deep down, just an idiot. Quickly he shoved words together in his head and before he knew it, Hunk had finished speaking. “I’m Lance McClain, of Earth. I pilot the Blue Lion of Voltron. I look forward to getting to know you beautiful people,” he said, winking, while dying inside because that was lame as hell. Whatever, confidence gets you everywhere.

He looked to Keith, who stood stiff as a soldier. “I am Keith Kogane. I pilot the Red Lion. Thank you for having us,” he said, bowing. 

All eyes went back to Bozena for further guidance. She ushered the group to sit, and they did. She then spoke again. “The paladins proposed an alliance that would unite the free peoples of the universe in a bond of peace that supports the prosperity of all. I have reviewed their contracts and agree that this is the right direction for us to go in. So let us bond with them, so each of you representatives of your clans can see their true hearts, and we can celebrate a new era together.”

Lance saw all the Ludia stand, removing their shoes. Lance looked awkwardly to his left and right, and saw everyone was doing the same. Lance shrugged, and shucked his boots and stepped forward onto the sun-warmed rocks. The Ludia joined hands with those standing next to them, and Lance took Hunk’s hand. Reluctantly, he held his right out towards Keith. The asshole stood there, a weird look on his face.

“Come on,” Lance said, rolling his eyes. They were just holding hands for the sake of universal peace, Keith could get over whatever his issues were. Lance grabbed Keith’s hand, and found it nice and cool, fingers calloused from years of combat. Lance didn’t care to see or hear whatever problems Keith had with him holding his hand, and instead looked to Bozena. She began speaking in the Ludia’s native tongue. The wind blew a nice breeze, a balm to the heat of their blazing sun. Lance saw all the Ludia close their eyes and tilt their heads back. Lance did the same, and felt a weird energy in the air around him. He kept his eyes closed as he felt a weird sensation pass from Hunk’s hand to his, up his arm, through his chest, and down his arm to Keith’s hand. He was kind of panicking at the new, impossible sensation, but was committed to seeing it through. He was not fucking up their chance at peace.

Keith’s hand tightened around his, and he suddenly felt a sensation creep from Keith’s hand to his. It was hot, almost burning, so cold it was hot. It was a lot at once, that Lance felt like the air had been punched out of him when it reached his heart. It swirled there, overwhelming Lance like waves breaking on a shore. Lance was hit with a wave of warmth, like a hug from his mom. But then that was knocked out by a wave of heat, so hot it felt like Keith's hand was a smoldering iron. Before he could get his bearings, Lance was washed over with a wave of burning cold, like he grabbed a handful of ice. The waves repeated, hitting him with warmth, then fire, then cutting cold. Lance was unsure how long he stood there, overcome with this energy, but felt it break abruptly.

Lance opened his eyes, blinking back into reality. He saw that most of the Ludia were now seating themselves again. He did the same, feeling awkwardly empty.

“That concludes the meeting of hearts,” Bozena said, looking like she knew something Lance didn’t. “Our Paladins hold secrets in their hearts, but mean us no harm and are honest in their intentions toward us. You all could feel this through the bond.”

Many of the Ludia nodded, some laughing. Lance looked over to Keith, whose head was ducked. His stupid mullet covered his face, so Lance was just left with questions as to what the fuck that all was coming from Keith. Lance knew that his and Keith’s relationship was weird, but if that feeling was Keith’s heart, why did it hurt? Why did it burn so much? Did Keith really hate Lance that much? Cold hurt settled in Lance’s chest. He always thought their relationship was a rivalry where they respected each other and secretly admired each other. So did Keith really feel so passionately, so angrily hot, and so hatefully burning cold?

Lance looked to the ground, overwhelmed by the sadness this realization brought him. He thought over all the memories he had of himself and Keith. Fighting Galra back to back, gaming in Pidge’s room, training together. Lance had always thought they were closer than brothers, having fought and trained and lived and laughed together for so many years.

Apparently, he was wrong.

He was shaken, unable to focus. He zoned out the rest of the meeting, standing numbly as Bozena signed the coalition documents and shook hands with Allura. They were escorted back to the ship, and Lance sighed as soon as the doors closed.

“Dude, you okay?” Hunk asked. Lance looked up to see Hunk looking at him with concern, and Keith staring at him from across the room. Lance looked away as soon as he met eyes with Keith, and faced Hunk, forcing a lazy smile on his face.

“I’m fine,” Lance said. “Just still a little out of it. I drank _way_ too much the other night. I’m gonna take a nap.”

With that, Lance waved and turned to walk towards his room. He collapsed on his bed, feeling drained and oddly empty. He stared at the ceiling, unable to sleep but unwilling to do anything. It took a while, but eventually, unconsciousness took him.


	3. Dìqiu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Then are you mad at me? Did I do something?" Lance asked, desperately.
> 
> "No, you didn't do anything. It's not you-" Keith souttered, frustration rising in his voice. "It's me. I have issues. It's not you."

Lance had been training with Shiro when they got the call from Coran to meet in the bridge. Even though they decided against showering, they were still the last to make it into the room.

Sweat still pouring from his forehead, Lance lifted his shirt to wipe his face.

"All right, everybody!" Coran said, as chipper as ever. "We are about two of your Earth hours away from our next stop, Dìqiu. We will be staying overnight after the signing, because it would be rude in Renlèi culture for us not to. Sleeping in the presence of your comrades is a sign of trust, so we will be demonstrating that. You will all need to pack, but pack lightly, for an overnight stay. Unfortunately, you will have to wear your paladin uniforms the whole time. Oh, except when sleeping, I suppose. Anyway, we will stay for morning refreshments and then head on our way."

Everyone nodded in assent.

"That's all I have to say. Oh! Also, when you meet someone and before you leave, you need to bow, like this," Coran said, folding into a ninety degree angle. "It is a sign of respect. Social rules are on the stricter side in Renlèi culture, so we need to be respectful of that." Coran took a breath, looking around the room. "Any questions?"

No one spoke. As the third planet they went to, there was an understanding of how this was going to play out, and everyone was getting comfortable.

"All right, Paladins, be ready to meet in the foyer in a dobosh and a half!"

With that, Lance stood, stretching. He immediately went to his room, cleaned himself, packed a bag with casual clothes, deodorant, his toothbrush, and other essentials. He lay back in his bed, hoping to nap until Coran called. But when the speaker crackled on, Lance was still staring at the ceiling. With a sigh, he sat up, and headed to the foyer. He joked around with Hunk until they landed, the castle jarring slightly underfoot. Lance then steeled himself for the sight he would see when the doors slid open, excited to see the beautiful planet that awaited.

When the doors opened, he was surprised to see a gray sky littered with clouds. The sun and sky were hidden behind them. But the smart looking city that lay underneath the heady clouds was still gorgeous, deep slate and shiny black skyscrapers stood close to each other, reflecting the dull light of the sun. Wheeled vehicles zoomed in and out of the city. Plains of grass and rows of crops stretched into the horizon outside the city. The planet of Dìqiu reminded Lance of Earth, but a dreamlike, surreal version.

The people who greeted them, however, were the very opposite of Earth-like. Lance bowed on que with the others, but when he stood back up, he tried not to stare at the blue, scaled skin of the people in front of him. They were all a good foot taller than Lance, and had piercing, slit-pupiled eyes. They reminded Lance of snakes, except they had legs and arms protruding from their sides. Wait, that would make them lizard people.

Lance felt a sharp pain in his side and noticed that Pidge had elbowed him. He snapped to attention, and noticed that they were departing the ship. Lance followed, and shook off his thoughts. He had been so out of it lately, weirdly introspective and stuck in his head. Pidge was shooting him a look, one eyebrow cocked, as if to ask if Lance was okay. Lance smiled crookedly, sending Pidge a wink. Pidge squinted his eyes at him, but let it go.

They climbed into a vehicle and rode into the city. It started raining, and Lance was glad that these people had roofed transportation. He would've hated to walk that far with his Paladin suit on, especially in the rain.

They arrived in front of a wider building. It was labelled, but it was in the Rènlei native language, so Lance couldn't read it. They hurried inside as the rain turned into a torrential downpour. The Paladins and Rènlei representatives went into a conference room, with long cushioned benches arranged in a rectangle, with little white wooden tables in the center to hold drinks or papers or whatever.

"Thank you for agreeing to meet with us and consider our proposal," the Princess said, smiling politely.

"We are honored you considered us." A Rènlei said, bowing their head. "We would like to hear out your proposal, and then you will have to excuse us to discuss the matters."

"Of course, that is wise." Allura said.

"Before you start, we would like to offer our compliments and show hospitality." With that, the doors opened again and several Rènlei wearing white sheaths entered, and began pouring out steaming beverages for all. They also placed trays of what appeared to be pastries and cookies out on the low, white tables. Lance rolled his eyes with a smile as he saw Hunk light up. His friend's passion for baking was so cute and pure.

"Hopefully these will warm you. We were blessed with rain today, but it can leave one quite chilled."

Allura bowed, and expressed thanks on their behalf. Lance lifted his steaming mug and sniffed. It smelled warm, herbal, calming, like black tea. Except, this liquid was completely opaque and olive-colored, with the consistency of milk. Cautiously, he brought it to his lips and sipped.

It was delicious. It tasted like a vanilla-spice chai latte. He held it gently in his hands, hoping it would help warm him. He sat and listened intently as Allura explained the United Planets Coalition. The Rènlei were thorough, asking many questions. Luckily, the princess was more than ready to answer and discuss the details.

Lance tried to focus, but kept zoning out. He looked around the room and saw Pidge leaning forward, chin propped on their hands, listening attentively. Coran and Allura were wrapped in discussion, quite the professional diplomats. Shiro sat with perfect posture, hands folded calmly on the table. Hunk was relaxed back in his chair, staring at the tabletop, deep in thought about something. Lance's gaze moved on, and saw that Keith was staring at him.

As soon as they made eye contact, Keith dropped his gaze and his face turned beet red. Lance felt frustration burn in his chest, and he clenched his hands into fists under the table. What the hell was Keith's problem? With all his weird, moodier-than-normal behavior, Lance would almost think Keith had a crush on him! That was impossible though, because the only time Keith spoke to Lance was to irritate him and poke fun at him. It pissed Lance off. Who the hell did Keith think he was?

Sure, Keith was attractive. He had super nice, voluminous and silky hair, even if it was styled into a weird ass mullet. His skin was smooth and unblemished, despite all they had been through. Lance was jealous, he put so much effort into taking care of his skin and still it never looked that good. Keith was also super toned and had a nice ass. Lance was always mad because no matter how many squats and deadlifts he did, his ass remained flat, but of course Keith had to have a nice round butt. Of course Keith had to have what Lance could never achieve. Lance was out taking care of himself and doing his best to look great, and of course Keith had to look amazing without any effort.

And it wasn't just his looks. Keith, of course, also had to be good at everything. He was a better pilot. He was a great leader, able to make good calls in a split second on missions. Keith also had to be amazing in combat, beating Lance every time they sparred. And girls always were attracted to Keith, which was so unfair, because Keith was always an asshole.

There was a loud thwack, and Lance snapped out of his heated thoughts. He looked up to see the Rènlei standing. "We will have a recess, for us to discuss and come to an agreement. You are all welcome to retire in the next few rooms and rest."

The paladins all stood, bowing before following a smaller Rènlei into the adjacent room. Inside were couches and chairs arranged around another coffee table. A separate table was set aside with finger sandwiches and snacks, along with drinks. Everyone made themselves comfortable. Lance couldn't shake his thoughts of Keith, on what could possibly have made him so irritable.

That's when he noticed Keith stand, and leave the room. Lance stood and followed after a second, and saw Keith walking down the hall.

Gathering his courage, Lance jogged to catch up to the red paladin. "Keith, wait up. I want to talk to you."

Lance saw Keith freeze, then relax slightly and turn around. His face was guarded. "What is it, Lance?"

Lance stopped, and pressed his lips together. He stared at Keith, brain scrambling, wringing his hands together. Exasperated, he sighed, and threw his hands up. "Just, what is your problem with me?"

Keith blinked, confusion creasing his brow. "What?"

He looked uncomfortable, and Lance noticed the tips of his ears turning red.

"What is your problem with me?" Lance repeated. "You and I weren't ever super friendly, but recently you've just been giving me the cold shoulder. You yelled at me for no reason on Olkarion. During that hand holding ceremony, the energy that came from you was hot and cold and so much, dude. Do you hate me? Did I do something to make you actually hate me? I thought we were friendly rivals, but now you got me thinking you actually hate me and I hate that. I don't want you to hate me."

Keith's face was entirely red now. Lance felt bad for calling Keith out so abruptly, but Lance had to say something. Keith was staring at the floor, hands clenched at his sides.

"I don't _hate_ you," he said, gritting his teeth.

"Then are you mad at me? Did I do something?" Lance asked, desperately.

"No, you didn't _do_ anything. It's not you-" Keith souttered, frustration rising in his voice. "It's me. I have issues. It's not you."

"But you don't have issues with anyone else!" Lance protested. "Seriously, if there's something that happened or something I did-"

"It's not you!" Keith was gritting his teeth, and frustratedly ran a hand through his hair. "Look, I have been having issues with finding out I'm part Galra and my mom and the Galra admitted defeat-"

"That may be true, but it doesn't explain why your weird ass behavior has been isolated towards me." Lance countered, folding his arms. He wasn't letting Keith bullshit his way out of this one.

"Fuck!" Keith yelled, stepping closer to Lance, so that their faces were only inches away. "What do you want me to say, Lance! You want to hear the truth! Fine! I like you, okay? I have a stupid, big, dumb crush on you! Are you happy?"

Lance felt his whole body freeze over. His brain felt like it was working at snail speed. Keith… Keith liked him? Like, he _like-liked_ him? He saw Keith slowly seize up, realizing what he'd said, and horror dawned his features. Slowly, he staggered back away from Lance, before turning and running down the hall.

_Keith likes me?_

Lance struggled to process this, and the phrase repeated over and over in his head. Numbly, he walked back to the room and sat in a chair. Hunk came over to talk but Lance told him that he wasn't feeling well and wanted to rest his eyes.

After what felt like hours but was probably only a few minutes, Lance heard Keith return to the room. Someone asked if he was feeling okay, and Keith responded with a stiff "I'm fine," before sotting down somewhere. Lance didn't really know, he pretended to be asleep so he could avoid this awkwardness.

Lance felt guilty, that he never knew, he never picked up on it, he never considered Keith. He felt anxious, because what was he supposed to do now? That all depended on how he felt about Keith. But how did Lance feel about Keith? Lance didn't even know. He never considered Keith that way. It never once crossed his mind. Lance was happy that Keith didn't hate him, and didn't want to make Keith hate him, but could Keith ever be more than a friend?

Lance felt off-balance. Like he was suddenly walking on a tightrope, and any misstep would make for a long fall to a painful crash. He was so pre-occupied with trying to mentally regain balance that when Hunk nudged him, he was surprised to open his eyes and see that they were still on Rènlei.

He looked around him, surreptitiously trying to locate and distance himself from Keith. He didn't want to be around him until he could sort himself out and talk to Keith with a clear intention. Lance stepped quickly towards the door, squeezing between Allura and Pidge as they filed out of the parlor and back into the conference room. Once seated, the Rènlei's spokesperson stood to address them.

"I'm pleased to announce that we have read and agreed to your terms for the Coalition. We have signed our alliance. As a show of trust and gratitude, allow us to show hospitality and take care of you as honored guests for the evening."

Princess Allura stood, grinning. She bowed, and then spoke. "It is our honor to serve and protect the galaxy, and we humbly accept your gracious offer."

The Rènlei stood, bowed, and filed out of the room. All except for two, who waited patiently for the others to leave.

"We will show you to your quarters, then. Please follow us." All the Paladins stood, and Lance made sure to stay away from Keith. Which was easy, because Keith made an effort to hang back begin everyone. Lance was thankful, for once, that Keith was awkward and mopey.

"You will be resting in our ambassador suite, which has four sleeping chambers, as well as a private outdoor bath and dining area. Your evening meal will be delivered shortly. Attendants will be at your service, posted in the entry room, should you require anything."

Lance half-listened as they were lead out of the building and back into the transportation vehicle. This whole trip was weird, and his discomfort was making him feel restless. He tried not to bounce his leg as they were driven out of the city. He couldn't focus on where they were going, only on the fact that Keith was sitting very close to him, only Hunk between them. Lance avoided looking in Keith's direction, choosing instead to stare at his boots.

The drive wasn't very long, but time was dragging on ever so slowly, from Lance's point of view. When the car stopped, he couldn't stop from bouncing his leg as he waited for the chauffeur to open his door (he didn't want to be rude). When he was out of the car, he stretched out his limbs and took in their guest house.

It was a simple black building, similar to the others in the city, but this building rested in solitary upon a beautiful hillside. Coniferous trees provided seclusion and crisp, fresh air. A wall extended beyond the building on either side, fencing in the building, providing more privacy.

Lance followed their guides through the gate, where a beautifully maintained lawn surrounded the building. After entering the building, and passing through the entryway, the entered a large, cavernous room, almost like the first floor of a fancy, open-concept house. A kitchen area with white marble countertops, and a dining area with an ornately carved table and chairs, and a seating area with plump-cushioned chaises and lounges, and a reading nook with bookshelves stacked to the brim with tomes, and a hallway stemming from the left and right sight of the room. Straight ahead was a door that looked like it lead outside.

"There are two rooms on the left and two on the right. We will leave you to your rest, if you have any requests, we will be in the entryway. Please, enjoy yourselves. We will present dinner shortly."

The two Rènlei bowed, and exited. There was a pause, before Coran stepped up. "All right, time to assign rooms. I've calculated the most fair and comfortable sleeping arrangements for all of us. No whining, now-" he said, as Pidge moaned, "it's only for one night."

Lance swallowed thickly, fearing the absolute worst. But Coran wouldn't, would he? Lance clenched his fists, and forced himself to take a breath.

"The Princess will, of course, get her own room. I'll room with Shiro, and Hunk and Pidge, you two pair up nicely as you both snore and can sleep through anything."

Hunk and Pidge both protested at the accusation, but Coran held up a finger. "I monitor the ship, I have walked past your rooms,I know these things for a fact. It just makes sense that those whose sleeping habits are compatible should share rooms."

But Lance had stopped listening. Because those room assignments meant-

"Anyway," Coran continued. "That leaves Keith and Lance to share the last room."

-Lance would be spending the night in the same bed as the boy who confessed to love him.

**Author's Note:**

> I started this because of my boredom in the COVID-19 quarantine. Let's see how far it gets. Please leave a comment with any thoughts you have, constructive or otherwise! A writer cannot improve unless they receive feedback.


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